What Will You Do With Your Time?

All month long, we have been studying the story of Esther in JAM time at church. The kids have done a great job being able to relay the story of Esther into their own words. I have been excited about seeing the kids share the story and retell it. They talk about King Xerxes and how he was looking for a queen. Esther entered the pageant and the king liked Esther so much, he chose her to be his king. What I find interesting is that Esther never really desired to be queen. She didn’t want to be in the running. Maybe she was too shy or maybe she just really wasn’t that into the king and all the power and prestige that comes with being queen. For whatever reason she never really considered it. I love that her cousin, Mordecai, convinced her to enter the running to become queen. He believed that God had a plan for her life. He believed that God placed at the right place at the right time to bring about a change that would bring glory and honor to God.

Well, God did use Esther. Mordecai learned of Haman’s plan to kill the Jews. He convinced Esther to take a risk and go before the king and make him aware of Haman’s evil plan. Esther did the right thing. She took the risk. God used her to save His people.

My favorite part of Esther’s story comes when her cousin, Mordecai, tells her in Esther 4:14, “And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?” I wonder what God has placed us here for at such a time as this? I wondered as I taught the kids how God would use them for such a time as this. We have such a short window of time in this world. What will we do with it? How will God use us? Will we take advantage of this time – or will we miss the opportunity?

Without Pain There Is No Healing

Joshua’s leg was red and swollen. He found it difficult to walk and we could tell it was infected. He went to the doctor last Monday. He was prescribed a couple of antibiotics. We came back to the doctor Wednesday, he given a shot of antibiotics. We checked him into ER on Wednesday night and he was sent home. We took him back to the doctor on Thursday and they immediately admitted him into the hospital. It was scary to Kellie and I.

We sat there at the hospital holding our precious child wanting so badly to protect him. He was given an iv with a steady flow of antibiotics. It broke our hearts to see our 1-year-old child laying there with an iv. We were not sure how bad the situation was until the doctor and nurse began to explain that when we brought him in, it was close to being fatal. That thought still haunts us.

Joshua is a strong kid and he managed a lot of smiles during his hospital stay, but what sticks out the most are his screams. He hated to have anyone touch his leg, yet the doctor and nurses had to touch and examine it. They had to see that it was progressively getting better. When he was admitted, his white blood cell count was at 31,000. The normal is 5,000-10,000. He was in bad shape. The lab workers had to prick his finger to get his blood for testing. he screamed. We had to hold him down. There was a time when his iv came loose. He had to have it mover to the other arm. Three nurses and Kellie held him down. I entered the exam room as they were trying to insert the iv. He somehow managed to get a leg loose and kick one of the nurses. I came in to help. It was so hard to look at him. With tears in his eyes, he looked at Kellie and I. Though he unable to speak verbally, his eyes and tears told us what he was thinking. “Why are you letting them hurt me? Why are you helping them hurt me? Can you pick me up and hold me? Can you tell these people who are hurting me to go away?” It broke our hearts. How do you communicate to a one year old child that we are not hurting him, but helping him? The nurses and Kellie and I knew something he didn’t know. We knew that without this pain, there would be no healing. The pain was a part of the healing process.

I learned something that day. From a father’s perspective, I did want to just pick him up, hold and comfort him, and tell the ladies with the needles to go away and leave my son alone. But had I done that…I don’t want to speculate. I realized that this pain was part of the healing process. I had an image of Jesus as he was being beaten and nailed to the cross. I thought of his prayer in the garden where he asked God if there was any other way. I thought of the pain His heavenly Father must have felt as he saw his son having nails driven through his hands and feet. Jesus words on the cross were “My God, my God why have you forsaken me?” It is as though he is questioning, “Why must this happen?” And I pictured God, the heavenly Father looking down at His Son and answering, “Without pain the people have no true healing.” Without the suffering Savior, I have no healing. Without his pain, I am lost. Without his pain, I am hopeless.

I find myself sometimes looking toward the heavens and begging God, ” Why are you letting this happen? Can you make this pain stop? Can you take the hurt away? Will you make these people who are hurting me go away and leave me alone.” His quiet answer is “Without pain, my son, there is no real healing.” My pain helps me realize my need for God. My pain reminds me that although I may not realize it, my condition is severe – it is fatal. If I do not have the pain, I may not seek the doctor of my soul, the healer of my soul. Without the pain, I have no real healing. What about you? Do you have times of pain? Have they caused you to look toward the heavenly Father who is the healer of your soul? Look to Him – he has the cure for your heart’s condition. He is the healer.