Confessions of a Confused Christian

Friday, July 28, 2006

Do you ever ask why?

Have you ever found yourself asking why? Why God? Why do certain things happen? Why have there been over 100 murders in the city of Memphis? Why is the Christian church throughout the country in decline? Why?
Kellie and I find ourselves asking why when it comes to raising funds for adoption. All of our paperwork is finished. However our dossier sits on the desk of our social worker because we do not have the finances to continue. We are still thousands of dollars short. We ask why we cannot come up with the money.
Why must Leuleseged remain an orphan when we long so much to bring him home. Why?

Tonight I found myself asking why again. My mom called and was crying so hard I could barely understand her. She informed me that my parents house had burned. They have worked so hard on that house. For the first time in their lives, they had laid new carpet. My dad added on the house by building a den and expanding the bedroom. It is now gone. My dad runs an upholstery business from his garage - it is now gone. Their source of income is gone, they are without a home. I ask myself - why? They love God dearly. They were so excited to have family over and pray together and fellowship and live in community - now their home is gone. I cannot pretend to know what they are going through. I am sitting in my home right now. It is air conditioned, it contains all of my earthly possessions. But their home is destroyed. Their house is gone. I have fond memories of that house. I spent my high school years there. We moved around a lot and it was one of the few houses I actually considered home. It is now gone.

Honestly, I do not know how to respond. I will offer anything I have, but it seems so strange. I feel helpless being in Memphis while they are in Oklahoma. I could go to where they are, but what could I do? I can provide a shoulder to cry on, a prayer, an encouraging word, food.

As I began to question, I also began to realize how important it is to have a home that is not in this world. My parents house was burned, but their home is not of this world. The roof over their head is no more, but their true shelter is in the Lord.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Disturbing

I came across a News Day story from last year that is quite disturbing. When will we learn to love each other? Why do we look at people of another race and judge them as less than equal? This video shows that we still devalue certain races of people. I have white skin. However, I am no better than anyone else. All people are created equal. We are created in the image of God. It is sad to think of our son who we will be bringing home from Ethiopia having to face the racism in our society. However, we will teach him that he is equal. He deserves everything our biological son deserves. He deserves equal opportunity.

The color differences make our world a more beautifully diverse place to live. Why can't we realize that? Racism is not an inborn trait. No one is born a racist. In fact, children have little regard for the color of one's skin. They do not see the world as we do. Racism is learned. So the question is this: What are we teaching our children about race?

Compassion vs Anger

I love the story of Jesus healing the leper in Mark 1:40-45. I often wonder how long the man had this skin disease. Was it his whole life? Did he develop it later in life? Did he once have a family; a wife and children? If he did, how long had it been since he was able to embrace them? Did he once have a job? What did he do?

He obviously believed that Jesus had the ability to make him clean; to free him from his suffering. The NIV reads that Jesus was moved with compassion. According to Donahue and Harrington "Some Western manuscripts read orgistheis" which means being angered. The more difficult reading is preffered and many commentators prefer being angered. "The argument is that copyists (embarrassed at the anger of Jesus) would more likely change anger to compassion."

Although this is a disputed text, could it be that Jesus was angry? Not angry at the leper; not angry at the request, but angry at the suffering in this world. Could it anger our Lord that we suffer so much as a result of the sin in this world? I believe Jesus is compassionate. In fact, I prefer to read this text as Jesus is moved with compassion as he stretches out his hand and says to the leper, "I am willing; be clean." But I also can't help but think that Jesus must be upset, even angry, at how sin and suffering is so visible in this world. Does he look at the leper and get angry at the suffering? Does he look at the homeless in our cities and get angry that they have to suffer when there are so many affluent people who can help? Does he look at poverty stricken areas like Africa and get angry that they are malnourished and dying of starvation when we ask for to go boxes and throw out leftovers? Does it anger our Lord that we choose to often ignore the suffering around us so that we can live more comfortable lives? It is far easier to turn the other way when we see the hungry, the homeless, the suffering. But.........does that anger our Lord just a little to see the suffering? Compassion vs anger...it really has me thinking.